Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
Just convinced airport security that im sober. All i do is win.
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
He called me at 4am to ask me to marry him, then threw up into the phone for 10 minutes.
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
I told the bartender that his red, white and blue shots were terrible and tasted like Thomas Jefferson's balls.
The dick lei will go down in squad history
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize
