ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
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