It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
I know her cup size but not her name....
Randomize
