I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
Randomize
