I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
Found a fruit roll up in my pocket this morning. This means my daughter has a peach blunt wrap in her lunchbox.
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
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