Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
There's glitter in my speakers, piles of cheezits on the floor, a random Audi in the driveway and a homeless dude napping in a lawn chair in the backyard. Wtf happened last night?
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
Randomize
