You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
It's really awkward to greet the pastor when I know I've licked chocolate syrup off his daughter's chest.
She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
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