Remember that night when i almost got you arrested? Is that funny yet?
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
Randomize
