I was to big spoon the shit out of you right now
I'm so hungover and dru,k
great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
Today would have been my 8th wedding anniversary and I woke up with a hot European guy in my bed. Divorce has it's perks.
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
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