do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
If anyone wants to ring in the new year with gluttony and yoga pants, let me know. As soon as it becomes a socially acceptable hour to drink margaritas, I'm gonna go down on a chimichanga.
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize
