And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
I'm using the Malibu pitcher you stole from the bar to make pancakes this morning. It's actually working really well.
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
Randomize
