I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
Randomize
