i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
My dad just told me he used to masturbate to cat woman...he then proceeded to beat my brother in beer pong and wont let me play...
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
Please tell me you werent the one who replaced every beer bottle in my fridge with a picture of a baby kitten.
... and if i was..
Fuck. You.
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
Come share oat with me in your robe
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
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