JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
no. you can't hotbox the world.
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
Took out half a tooth with a handle of jim beam last night. Apparently I can't walk and chug bourbon at the same time
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
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