i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
Randomize
