i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
i feel like even strangers are annoyed with me because of how drunk i was last night
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
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