I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
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