Got a toothbrush?
is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
How can I explain how nice he is to you? ...like, I'm going to have to have my world famous why being a douche is sexy talk.
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
Randomize