You just made me feel so damn special
His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
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