He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
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