SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
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