question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
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