ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
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