I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
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