weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
A guy I don't even know just ate me out on a washing machine at a random persons afterparty. I came as it was going through spin cycle.Just kept thinking "who does laundry during a party?"
Randomize
