I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
Let's paint friendship bongs
I think I sprained my soul last night
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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