thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
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