She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
... thanks for letting me perform minor surgery on myself last night.
I figured if you were smart enough to sterilize with vodka, you could handle it.
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
Randomize