Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
Please remind me next time not to call the ex who cheated on me to cry about the ex who forgave me for putting him in prison. It would be much appreciated.
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
