Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
Dude there are two smokin hot chicks laying outside my apartment...I almost want to tell them theyre laying where I threw up last night
U should. Its a good ice breaker
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
If I die it's either cuz I undercooked my burger or because I used questionable cheese. I have no pants on, so if there's a wellness check, you go in first.
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
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