i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
Randomize