Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
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