ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
No one knows how to work that "I pulled a muscle in my leg" drunk swagger like you can
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
Randomize
