Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
Randomize
