this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
Randomize
