Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
i wanna have a kid now so by the time he's 20 ill only be 42 and assuming im already divorced we can pick up girls together
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
I love millennial parents. One of the moms at the daycare center literally told me she and her husband named two of her kids after batman characters and one after game of thrones
Randomize
