Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
My 12 y/o god son's bandmate just asked me to their school dance. Still he's a better catch than the last one...
It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
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