I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
In hindsight, maybe rearranging his living room because he has OCD while he was out wasnt the greatest idea. Though it'll keep him busy for HOURS
Randomize
