so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
If he ever pulls my hair again, I'm going to conveniently have lock jaw. Then he can decide whether pain during sex is still fucking appealing.
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
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