she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
No. Way more drunk than the night I put a snowball in my purse "for later" and woke up to find everything soaking the next day.
But less drunk than the day that Pete took four of your birth control pills thinking they were Advil, right?
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
last night I used snow as a chaser
Randomize