I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
Being engaged is strange. I looked at my cock this morning and said, "we did alright these last 32 years, right?"
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
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