I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
Yeah apparently i got lonely because everyone was hooking up so i took matters into my own hands. I woke up on the floor spooning a vaccuum cleaner, a mop, 40 paper cups, and industrial grade detergent.
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
Ugh he's texting me.
Tell him you're no longer interested in what he has to offer; his shitty personality outweighs his sexual prowess.
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
Randomize
