And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
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