Her mom drove me home after I blew a .13 So there I am wishing her mom a happy mother's day sitting in the passenger seat where I just banged her daughter 15 min prior
Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
So don't be alarmed when you go into your bathroom, he's sleeping in the tub with your brothers dinosaurs. also I'll clean up the sticky floor later. (you don't wanna know)
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
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