I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
I love that my idea of a romantic gesture to you is to send you a picture of my vomit saying "wish you were here". You voluntarily dated me. For six years ish.
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
People...there is no better feeling in the world than finding out via Google that your ex has a warrant out for his arrest. No better feeling.
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
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