guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
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