yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
You're like the curious george of whores
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
Randomize