i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
You peed on a flamingo?!?
Randomize
