This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
Randomize
