Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
They're the one who can profit the most when given the opportunity for blackmail.
At least that's how I've always seen it whenever I've been the Designated Driver.
That simultaneously explains everything and makes me very very terrified of you.
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
How is it that I can make it to my 8am Friday morning still drunk after passing out the night before...but not to my 9am on Tuesday that I went to bed early for? Irony or karma?
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
Randomize
