The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
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